For just that split second AJ stared as Brian came into view, bag in hand. Then he deliberately turned back to his coffee pot and continued to prepare his cup of coffee. It felt like everything that had happened, that had been happening, hung between them, leaving the air with a charged feeling. The silence grated at AJ like nothing else. He hadn’t been lying when he’d told Brian he’d rather be hit than ignored. But he wouldn’t be the one to break this silence. At least, not yet.
As the bus started to move, Brian was the one to break the silence. His words caught AJ off guard. “Look, we may not like one another, and we may spend more time insulting one another than anything else, but what I said back there was uncalled for. I said something with horrible implications and it wasn’t at all what I meant. For that, I want to say sorry.”
Ok, what the hell. Never once had either one of them apologized for the words they’d said to the other. He didn’t quite know how to respond to this. What Brian had said had hurt, yes. But he wasn’t about to let him know that. One of the first things you learned when defending yourself against others was to never let them see you cry. Never let them know that their actions or words hurt. If you did, they could use it against you. So, grabbing his coffee cup, he settled on the safest answer as he headed toward the back of the bus. “Whatever.”
A frustrated sigh echoed down the bus toward him. “AJ, be serious for a minute. Put aside the attitude and listen to me. I didn’t mean to imply, well, you know. I meant that you’re more easy-going than I am. When something happens you just take it in stride and keep rolling. I’m not like that. I’m not like you in that way. That was what I meant.”
Huh, put like that, AJ had to admit that it made sense. Maybe he’d overreacted a little. Just a little, though. “Ok, fine. Apology accepted.” He said as he plopped down on the couch. If he was lucky, Brian would just go lie in his bunk or stay at the front of the bus. Then they wouldn’t have to deal with one another at all.
No such luck. Brian walked right back there and sat on the couch opposite him. Jesus Christ didn’t this guy know when to give up? After a night like they’d had, and then the morning after, AJ really wasn’t in the mood to see him. He was sleep deprived, pissed off from fighting, hurt more than he wanted to admit to, and sore as hell. The very last thing he wanted was another pissing contest with Brian. “Is there something you need, Littrell?” he asked, making sure his tone conveyed how little he cared about the answer.
“Can you be civil for five minutes to talk to me?” Temper had Brian’s blue eyes flashing in a way that set AJ’s heart to beating. There was no point in fighting that one. He found Brian Littrell attractive. More than that. He wanted him in a way he’d never wanted anyone else. But he could deal with that. At least, he could if Brian would go the fuck away for a bit. He wished Brian would pull his ball cap back down to at least shelter his eyes.
“Probably not.”
“Come on, AJ! I was scared this morning, but even I can admit now that this isn’t something we can just forget happened. Especially not with the bruises we’re both wearing.”
Wasn’t that the truth! AJ ached in so many places it was unbelievable. The ones from the fight irritated him. The others, well, those he didn’t mind so much. He’d earned those, and then some. Holding up his free hand, AJ looked at the bruising around his wrist. He saw Brian’s gaze drop to it, and the flash of surprise there. He hadn’t noticed that one. “Yeah, I bruise easy.” He admitted, taking a sip off his coffee as he watched Brian through his shades. “Doesn’t take much to mark my skin. Plus, you had a tight grip.”
“I didn’t hear you complaining.” Brian instantly snapped back. The look that crossed his face next was both embarrassed and annoyed. At himself, most likely.
His response amused AJ. He found some of his bad humor fading as he shifted, easing the ache in his backside. “Nope, didn’t say I did. Far from it, actually. You’re a right little firecracker.”
“This…I meant what I said about this not happening again. I don’t know what it is about you, AJ. No one has ever made me react like that before. I’ve never been attracted to a guy before. But I can’t be involved with another man. Especially one who I can’t be around for more than three minutes without fighting with.”
“Was I asking you to be involved with me? I don’t recall getting on one knee and proposing to you. Even I’m not that stupid.” Sipping at his coffee again, AJ purposely gave Brian the smirk he knew he hated. Sometimes it was so much fun to banter with Brian. He couldn’t deny that a part of him enjoyed getting under the little southern boy’s skin.
Sighing, Brian ran his hands through his hair. “Where does this leave us? I don’t think we can just forget about this. We’re stuck rooming together all tour long.”
“We’re exactly where we used to be. Great band mates, horrible fucking friends, and now we can add we’re dynamite in bed together. You, Littrell, sure shocked the shit out of me there. Who know that little Saint Littrell was such a freak in bed?” AJ set his empty coffee cup in the cup holder beside the couch before leaning back and stretching his arms over the back of the couch. Not only did it ease his aches, but it made him look relaxed and amused, even if he wasn’t.
It was hell, sitting here staring at Brian with all these new feelings inside of him. What Brian said was true, he did tend to just roll with the punches and not stress over something he couldn’t change. But he still had to come to terms with it. So much had happened all at once that his brain still felt like it was whirling around and around, trying to settle down. Having Brian this close was not helping at all.
Lust and annoyance built in Brian’s eyes again. God, that shouldn’t have been such an attractive combination, but it was. AJ found himself wanting to lean over and just take a bite.
On the outside AJ looked utterly calm. His lips were curved in a small smirk, and his sunglasses sheltered his eyes so that nothing could be read out of them. With his arms spread on the back of the couch and his legs in front of him, crossed at the ankles, he looked totally at ease where he was. In complete control of himself.
Inside he as a wide contradiction of emotions. Lust that seemed to burn his veins; confusion about that lust. Since when had he been attracted to Brian? Anger, at himself and Brian both. Hurt, from words that had been said. But not a lick of it showed on the outside.
“Is that all you can think of, AJ?” Brian snapped in response to AJ’s earlier comment. “And I’ve told you! Quit calling me Saint Littrell!”
AJ bit his lip and tipped his head. “Last night I would have said you didn’t deserve the title anymore, but…you sure got the guilt going on this morning that gives you your title back. I get the picture here, Littrell. I was good for an overnight fuck, but you don’t have the balls to do it again. Whatever. Scuttle away to your bunk and leave a man in peace, now.” He waved his hand in the air, dismissing him. For just a second AJ wondered what he was doing, but it didn’t take him long to think on it. Even if he was still worried about things, and still so mixed up, one part of AJ knew that he wanted Brian. Wanted the closeness they’d shared even under the passion. He wanted to taunt Brian into doing this again.
It seemed to be working. Brian looked frustrated with him, those eyes flashing. His face looked taut, pulling the skin tight over the huge bruise on his jaw. That probably hurt. AJ couldn’t bring himself to really feel that bad about it. Brian had deserved that punch.
“Are you…excuse me?” Brian stammered out. “What did you just say to me?”
“You heard me. Go scuttle away to your bunk, Littrell. Wouldn’t want to have you say I held you back here against your will. I know it’s easier to blame it on me and that’s ok. If you’re not man enough, well.” AJ trailed off with a shrug. In his mind he was cursing himself, calling himself all sorts of names. Did he want to add a new bruise to the ones he already had? But that passion inside of him for Brian was growing and growing until it was all he could think on. He had to know if it was just him. Had to do this, to test Brian, to make sure that it was real.
That was the crux of it. AJ had to know; was what they’d shared been something that was an aberration? A shameful memory that Brian would shove in the back of his mind and forget about? Or was there a chance that it was just as strong for him as it was for AJ. He had to know!
Brian rose furiously from the couch, glaring down at him. For a second AJ thought that Brian was going to attack him, but then the blond haired beauty was moving to the doorway. Regret was the first thing AJ registered in his heart. Then wonder that it mattered at all. But close on those was surprise. Brian wasn’t leaving. He grabbed the partition that separated the back room of the bus from the rest of the bus and closed it, giving them as much privacy as possible.
Turning around, Brian walked back over slowly, almost stalking. He grabbed his ball cap and tossed it onto the couch only seconds before he was there himself, straddling AJ’s waist.
Everything inside of AJ instantly set on fire. He couldn’t think at first beyond the passion that was exploding into him. Thankful for his sunglasses, he watched Brian’s face as he spoke, leaning down to whisper only inches from AJ’s lips. “You think I’m not man enough?” There was anger in Brian’s voice, but it was like it had been last night; tinted with lust. AJ shivered. “That I don’t have the balls to do this again?”
The bus continued to roll on underneath them, the vibrations barely registered by the two men. All AJ could focus on was the furious, attractive person straddling his lap. “If the shoe fits.” AJ drawled mockingly. He kept his arms back, not bothering to react, though he ached to grab Brian’s hips and grind furiously against him. Last night he had thought the passion was the highest he had ever felt. Now that he knew what it was like to be buried in that heat, or to be filled completely by Brian, the lust, the need, was even stronger.
A small sneer covered Brian’s face. “You think you’re so smart, don’t you?” he hissed out, one hand sliding up AJ’s chest. “You’re trying to piss me off on purpose.”
“If you know that, what the hell are you doing still sitting here, Littrell?”
For a moment a look of uncertainty crossed Brian’s face for a second, filling his eyes. AJ held his breath, watching to see what would happen. Inside of him he knew that there was something important about this. What it was, he didn’t know. But he could feel it; a shifting in things. A change. How Brian reacted to this was going to alter both their lives. Suddenly AJ found himself afraid. His stomach twisted up in knots. Which outcome he was afraid of, he couldn’t say. But things were going to change after this, one way or another.
He could see the same thoughts reflected in Brian’s eyes. Watching, AJ saw the doubts and the fears and the uncertainty pass, leaving behind a determination. The hand on his chest slid up and over his throat, forcing his chin up. Passion turned Brian’s blue eyes into sharp blue flames. As the hand on his throat squeezed, AJ’s heart started to thud. Excitement had his body tingling. The decision had been made and there was no going back now. What it meant, AJ wasn’t sure. But he would go along for the ride as long as it lasted.
“You just ask for trouble, AJ.” Low and slightly dark, Brian’s voice had AJ wanting to shiver.
When Brian bent, letting his lips brush against AJ’s, the two of them shuddered. Images of the night came to mind. “You want me to give you trouble?” The idea excited the both of them. AJ pushed his throat against Brian’s hand and rocked his hips upwards. “Is that what you want, Littrell?”
“You can try.” Brian growled, nipping at AJ’s lip.
The words gave AJ a huge thrill. Never would he have guessed that Brian could be this rough, this dominating. It had made their night interesting and thrilling. Two dominating personalities in the bedroom taking turns at being the one in charge. But this time he intended to make Brian fight for it. The idea of it, the excitement of it, set AJ’s blood to pumping.
Brian leaned in again to kiss this time instead of nip. Waiting until their lips were connected, until the kiss was starting to burn through him, AJ took hold of Brian’s bottom lip and bit. Hard. The shock of it had the hand on his throat loosening which gave AJ just enough of a second to throw his hips up, almost completely dislodging Brian. Then he dove to the side, almost managing to escape. Almost.
When Brian’s hands caught his waist, AJ grinned to himself. He had purposely moved slow enough to let Brian catch him. That was the point of this game. But he wasn’t going to make it too easy. So when Brian tried to grab his hands, AJ bucked and twisted and rolled, trying to get set free.
Suddenly Brian’s hands locked on his wrists like clamps. AJ was on his stomach on the couch, his face buried in the pillows as he panted and Brian pulled his arms back, forcing him to stay there. That didn’t mean that he gave up. He kicked back, connecting with something. What, he couldn’t see. There was a grunt and then he was being lifted by his elbows, laid down over the back of the couch. It put his upper half on the counter that was directly behind this couch, tucked into the corner. It was a space intended for books and different things, but now Brian used it as a table to lay AJ on, holding him there by jerking his wrists up behind his back.
“You little shit.” Brian swore, his words almost gasping from him. A low moan built in AJ’s throat at hearing Brian swear. Sweet God but it sounded sexy in that southern voice, turned down low to almost a growl. “That was my shin.”
“You wanted trouble.”
“I’ll give you trouble.”
With those words, AJ felt his body adjusted so that his ass was better in the air. Then Brian’s hand was on his jeans, yanking them down his hips. Angled as he was there was no way for him to see what Brian was doing, so he had no idea what was coming. That made the whole thing that much more thrilling. When a finger entered him roughly he gasped and bit his lip. Then there was two and they were scissoring him, stretching him. He moaned and pretended to struggle again.
Those fingers left him and one hand came down, smacking against his ass. The surprise of it had him sucking air in past his teeth. Another one landed on the other side, making him moan this time. Brian bent over him, that hard part of him cradling against AJ’s ass, making him want more. He struggled against the hand holding his wrists. “You’re such a slut, AJ.” Brian whispered into his ear. “You like this. You like the pain of it.”
It was the truth. AJ didn’t answer, though. He tossed his head back, letting the top of his head connect with Brian’s chin. It made him see stars a little, but it had Brian gasping. The hand around his wrists tightened for a moment before something suddenly was winding around them. It took AJ a second to realize that Brian had taken his belt off and was using it to bind him. Holy God. Any blood left in AJ’s head dropped straight down to his throbbing cock.
Once he had them fastened, Brian let go of AJ’s wrists to take hold of his hips. Just as he slapped AJ’s ass again, making him moan one more time, he thrust deep inside him.
AJ buried his face against the countertop and bit his lip to keep from screaming at the pain even as his hips pushed back, begging for more. Brian didn’t disappoint him. He held on to the long part of the belt, using it as leverage as he started to thrust in and out.
It was everything that AJ had remembered. Hot and hard and so intense that he could barely think. He had to fight to keep from screaming when he felt Brian change pace, starting to tease him by slowing down before slamming in again harder than ever. “Dammit, Brian! Quit teasing me!”
A hand slapped his ass again, but Brian picked his pace up. Within moments AJ could feel his orgasm starting. His head dropped down and his back arched up as he pushed backwards against Brian’s thrust. The scream wanted to tear out of his throat but he held it in, biting at his lip, his cheek, anything to keep it inside as his body exploded into a million pieces and he emptied himself against the material of the couch.
He felt Brian’s thrust start to become jerkier, and he could hear his breathing speeding up. One thing he’d learned was that Brian was a screamer. “Bite me!” AJ ordered him. “Do it, Brian! Now!”
Brian bent down, biting on to AJ’s shoulder right as his orgasm hit him. The strength of that bite had AJ shuddering, but it worked to keep Brian from screaming the bus down. The last thing they needed was the driver pulling over and coming back to see what was wrong.
The two finally collapsed onto the couch, AJ still bound, resting against Brian’s chest. As their breathing evened out, he looked up at the older man. “I think it’s time we actually talked.”
“I think so too.”