Something was going on with Brian Littrell. Of that, AJ was positive. But what it was, he wasn’t quite sure. Whatever it was, though, was changing Brian into a totally different person. Oh, he still showed up for everything. He still laughed at peoples jokes and talked to them. But, not like friends. Not like brothers. He spoke to them like they were all co-workers.
That bothered AJ quite a bit. Not just because they all worked together and for so many months a year they pretty much lived together. But because Brian was his friend, a friend that AJ had always counted on to be there, and now Brian just…wasn’t. Oh yeah, Mclean. That’s not selfish sounding at all. He thought to himself wryly.
Leaning back on his elbows, resting them on the bleacher seat behind him, AJ lit a cigarette. He watched the basketball game going on below him between Brian and Kevin. It was too nice a day to sit inside, so he’d come down to sit in the bleachers and watch them play. To himself he could admit that he would take just about any excuse to see Brian out there on the court. All flushed and warm, sweat on his skin, his shirt clinging to those washboard abs…
A arm suddenly wrapped around his neck just as a hand connected with his head, rubbing back and forth. AJ squawked and jumped in the short second it took him to break out of his fantasy and realize it was Nick. “You fucking shit!” he swore, shoving at Nick as his friend laughed and sat next to him.
“You looked so serious sitting here, J. I couldn’t resist” Nick chuckled at him.
Well, shit. If Nick had noticed the way he’d been staring off into space, then it would be obvious to anyone else with half a brain cell. AJ took a drag of his smoke and snickered at his own thought. “I was thinking about shit.” He said in an attempt to distract Nick so he wouldn’t realize that AJ had been staring at someone.
To AJ’s surprise, Nick sighed and leaned back, propping his elbows up on the bleacher seat behind him just like AJ. “You were thinking about Bri too, huh?”
The question caught AJ off guard. Holy shit, was he really that obvious? Cigarette dangling from his mouth, AJ turned to look at his blond friend, suddenly nervous. No one knew how AJ felt about Brian. No one knew the thoughts that he had; thoughts that he tried so hard to keep to himself. To keep away from the holier than thou Littrell.
Nick was too busy staring out at the court to notice AJ’s expression. He just continued to talk, his voice quiet and low so that only AJ would be able to hear him. “Something’s going on with him. I haven’t been able to figure it out, and when I try to talk to him he just kind of shuts me out, you know?”
A sigh slid past AJ’s lips. Half relief, half worry. Relief, thank God that no one had caught on to his secret. Worry, something was wrong with Brian. “I know, Frack. He’s treating us like fucking co-workers. He hasn’t said shit to you?” AJ flicked his ash on the opposite side of Nick, carefully watching his face, noting all the worry that was there and hoping that Brian had at least talked to someone.
But Nick shook his head. “He hasn’t said shit to me at all. I tried to corner him, and he pulled the ‘I’m fine’ bullshit he always does when he doesn’t wanna talk. Usually by now he comes to me and tells me what’s going on in his head.”
“Yeah. I’ve thought about going to nag it out of him.” AJ admitted, taking another drag off his cigarette. His eyes drifted back toward Brian. There was definitely something bothering Brian. He hadn’t been the same since they’d come back from break. What had happened, AJ had no idea. But he could tell it had been bad. That light that was always in Brian’s eyes just…wasn’t there anymore.
He never really smiles anymore. AJ thought to himself. Sure, he smiles at us, but it’s not real. There’s nothing behind it. It’s like someone took the spirit in him and just, took it away. It’s not right. Brian should be happy.
A snort from Nick brought AJ’s attention back to the present. “Fuck, Bone, if I can’t get it out of him, your nagging isn’t gonna work.” Nick said mockingly.
For some reason that put AJ’s back up. Who did Nick think he was? “People talk to me plenty, thank you very much!” He glared over at Nick.
“Not about shit like this. This is the type of thing him and I talk about. Trust me, Bone. I couldn’t get him to tell me. He sure as shit isn’t gonna tell you.”
Annoyance had AJ flipping his sunglasses up to better glare at him. “Cocky shit, aren’t you? He’d talk to me just fine. We’re friends too, fucker.”
A corner of Nick’s mouth quirked. There was nothing he enjoyed more than picking on his friends. It was always too easy with AJ. Almost didn’t take any effort to annoy him. But when the opportunity presented itself, Nick couldn’t turn it down. He and AJ had been bickering for years. “Shit, J, he probably tells you things just so you’ll shut up and go away.”
“Go fuck yourself, Carter.” AJ ground out his cigarette and found himself turning and lighting another. God, Nick got under his skin sometimes. So damn bratty and full of himself. Like he was the best thing to walk the fucking earth. “You’re just pissy cause you don’t want to admit that he’d tell me even after he wouldn’t tell you.”
“The fuck he would.” The playful tone had left Nick’s voice. He sat up, turning to face AJ, and it was his turn to look annoyed. Seeing that there gave AJ a satisfied feeling. He loved being able to get one up on the blond wonder.
“You totally know he would.” AJ gloated, content now.
“Bullshit. I know he wouldn’t. Hell, I’d stake money on that shit.”
Rolling his eyes, AJ deliberately flicked the ashes of his smoke, letting the wind blow it at Nick just to piss him off. “Betting on your friends feelings? Pretty fucking cold, Frack.” He scoffed. Just as he turned his eyes back toward the game, Nick said the one word that could get underneath AJ’s skin. One word he knew better than to say, but he said it anyways.
“Chicken?”
Very slowly AJ turned his head back toward Nick. His hand was still at his mouth, holding the cigarette there. “What did you say?” he asked slowly.
Nick just smirked at him. “I said you’re chicken. You know I’d win the bet, that’s why you won’t do it. You know he won’t tell you shit.”
“The fuck you’d win. I won’t bet because he’s my friend and betting on his feelings and shit is bullshit. I’m not a fucking chicken.”
With an evil glint to his eyes, Nick bit his lip and nodded. “Sure thing, J. Whatever you say.” He waited until AJ turned his head again, and very quietly said “bawk, bawk.”
That was it. Cigarette still dangling from his mouth, AJ spun with a lightning fast move and launched himself at Nick. The younger man had been prepared for it and was braced to try to catch himself. He knew that there was more strength to AJ’s wiry frame than most people thought.
AJ saw red as he grabbed hold of Nick’s collar and tried to slam him back. But Nick had strength on his side, and he started to flip them around in an attempt to pin AJ. Yet, where Nick had strength, AJ had speed and agility. He let his body twist a little, then grabbed Nick’s collar and rolled them off that bleacher and down to the next one.
They landed with a thump, Nick seeing stars as his head hit. They had landed behind one bleacher, where the people who sat on the one above it would put their feet. “I’m not a fucking chicken, you little shit.” AJ growled around the cigarette that was, somehow, still dangling from his lips.
“Prove it. You get a month to prove you can win this shit. Prove you’re not a fucking little chicken, J.” Nick grinned up at him. He couldn’t resist nettling AJ. He never had been able to, no matter how many bruises it earned him. “That is, unless you’re too scared to be around him.”
Something in the way Nick said that had AJ freezing. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
This was the moment. Nick looked in AJ’s eyes and knew he was doing the right thing. He had come out here to the bleachers with one thing in mind. One plan in his head. He knew that something was wrong with Brian, and he also had a small idea as to what it was. He’d had a few ideas about things that were going on with AJ as well. One look at AJ’s eyes told him he had been right.
So, Nick had thrown this plan together, knowing how it was going to end. Knowing that he could irritate AJ enough to get his way. After that, his two friends would be forced to be around one another. That was what Nick wanted. He wanted them to be in one another’s company in the hopes that the truth might come out. Might make two of his friends happy.
Keeping his goal in mind, Nick looked up into AJ’s surprised brown eyes and said the words that he knew would get him in a lot of shit. Fuck, this is going to hurt later. He thought to himself quickly. But, if it worked, it was going to be worth it.
“I’ve seen how you look at him, J. Is that why you don’t want to take the bet? Afraid if you spend too much time with Bri he’ll find out your little secret? That he’ll notice the way you check out his stomach, or stare at his ass.” The last nail in the coffin, and it hurt Nick more than he would ever let on to do it. But he had to get them together. He couldn’t stand seeing the two hurt anymore. “Afraid he’ll find out that big, tough AJ is really just a little fa-”
Just like Nick had suspected, AJ’s fist came flying at him, catching him right in his jaw. It was suddenly everything he could do to protect his body as AJ became this slippery thing with flying arms and legs.
AJ couldn’t control himself. His vision had gone red with the strength of his anger. Underneath that it was fueled by hurt. Hurt that Nick would talk to him that way. That he would use that word. All he could think of was hurting Nick in any way possible.
Somehow they rolled down one bleacher, and then another. AJ didn’t even register the pain was he hit metal over and over. Vaguely he heard voices shouting. He fought like a wild thing, managing to connect a few blows beyond Nick’s defense. Nick was managing a few blows himself. Enough that, normally, would have had AJ sitting back and seeing stars. Not now.
Those voices were what Nick focused on. He heard Howie shout “Shit! Kevin, Bri, come help me!” and two other “Fuck’s!” echo through the air. Then suddenly Nick felt AJ’s weight being yanked off of him. He blinked up, dazed, and watched as Kevin bodily lifted AJ into the air. His hands and feet were still moving as if he was still trying to hit and kick even as Kevin took a step or two back.
AJ felt his fury peak when a pair of arms wrapped around his waist, lifting him into the air. He wanted to hit Nick. To beat him into a bloody pulp. Tear him to absolute fucking shreds. No one, no one, called him a fag and got away with it!
“AJ! Age, come on! Jesus, fuck. Calm down!” A voice was saying in his ear. AJ ignored it, pulling at hands that he finally recognized as Kevin’s. He glared over to where Howie and Brian were helping a bruised and bleeding Nick to his feet. Seeing him standing there, AJ let out a roar of rage and redoubled his efforts to try and get free.
Kevin grunted and changed his grip, managing to pin AJ’s arms to his sides by holding him in a big bear hug. Still the scrawny man bucked and growled. Looking up at his other friends, Kevin called out “He ok?”
“Yeah.” Howie called back, stepping away from Nick. He made to come towards AJ, but the loud scream he got in warning had him stopping in his tracks. Only one other time had he seen AJ this livid, and that had been when his dad had first come back to his life in an effort to get money from him. The temper that AJ had unleashed in his house with only Howie to watch had been terrifying. This was more so.
Looking down at AJ’s head for a moment, Kevin looked over at Nick. “Fuck, Nick, what the hell did you say to him?” he asked. Quickly he shifted, trying to better pin AJ. It never failed to amaze them that someone so skinny could have that much strength. Looking at Nick’s face, Kevin added on, Who knew he could pack such a fucking punch. I’ve never seen him do that much damage to Nick before!
“I called him a chicken.” Nick said, mumbling around his now swollen lip.
The others looked at him incredulously. Then they looked at AJ, who was still doing his damndest to break free. It was Howie who called “Bullshit.” He looked at Nick sternly. “We all know that pisses him off, but not like this. What did you say to him to make him snap like that, Nick!”
In that one second, Nick hated himself. He hated what he was going to do, and what he was going to say. He knew how angry his friends would be with him after this. Knew that he was going to have to deal with their anger, and their temper. Knew also that it was going to lose him Brian’s friendship. If not forever, than at least for a little while.
But Nick knew what Brian’s secret was, even if Brian had been so drunk when he told him that he didn’t remember saying it. He knew what it was, and knew AJ’s secret, and knew this was the only way to fix things. If he didn’t do something, they would never get around to it, and two people who were his brothers would be miserable for the rest of their lives.
Determination firm inside of him, Nick reminded himself that this was for the great good, and said the words that would damn him. “I know his little secret, and I called him on it. I called him a fag.”
That stunned everyone enough that Kevin loosened his grip a little too much. AJ took advantage of it and launched forward with a scream. He almost made it to Nick, but this time Brian stepped in. He barely managed to catch AJ around the waist. Following that momentum, he swept AJ around in front of him.
One look at AJ’s face and Brian knew that it would be useless to stand there and try to hold him back. He decided to let the others deal with Nick. Right at that moment, he wanted nothing to do with that little blond fucker. Nothing. Brian’s own heart ached as he started to tow AJ down the bleachers. It was a struggle, but it was hampered by the fact that AJ seemed to be trying to avoid hurting Brian. Unashamed of it, Brian took advantage of that to get AJ out of there.
Just when they reached the bottom and were about to turn out of sight, Nick called down “Remember, Age! One month!”