A week later Brian walked into his hotel room and barely resisted sighing out loud. He had hoped to come in and change his clothes before heading down to Nick’s room without having to deal with AJ at all. But the fates conspired against him. AJ was already in the room. He was wearing just a pair of jeans and was hanging off the edge of the bed, digging underneath it.
God, why the hell had they put them through this? It was hell rooming with someone who never spoke to you, and if they did it was only for a nasty or snide comment. This was getting beyond ridiculous. How on earth were they supposed to be in a group together if they could barely stand the sight of one another?
As if to attest to that fact, AJ suddenly lifted his head and looked over at Brian. “Take a picture, Rok. It’ll last longer.” He said sarcastically. That little smirk was on his face that Brian just hated so much. He wasn’t a violent person but whenever AJ smirked or sneered at him it took everything he had not to slap it off his face.
“I was trying to figure out what the heck you were doing hanging off the bed.” He defended himself. Sighing in frustration, Brian moved over to his suitcase, trying it ignore his roommate. He hated that he’d been caught staring and that, yet again, AJ had got under his skin and made him feel so defensive. But that was so easy for AJ to do. He seemed to enjoy pushing Brian’s buttons. The little shit.
A nasty sounding chuckle came from AJ’s side of the room. “Oo, Littrell, you better watch yourself. One of these days you might actually make that last step and actually swear at me.” He taunted as he dropped his head back down and continued to search under the bed. “Can’t have little Saint Littrell using foul fucking language, now can we?”
Brian paused, having just taken his shirt off, and bunched the material in his hands. God! He hated, absolutely hated, when AJ called him that. So what if he was a religious man? That didn’t mean that he couldn’t live his life. That he couldn’t do anything at all. “Grow up, AJ. Just because I have my faith doesn’t make me this little prissy kid you seem to think I am. I think you forget, sometimes, who the kid in this room is.”
“You may be older in age, buddy, but I’m much older in experience. Hell, you probably never saw a pair of tits till the first fan flashed you.”
That was about it. Brian threw his shirt on the bed and strode over to where AJ was still hanging upside down from his bed. “Listen, AJ, I’ve had about enough. You and I don’t like one another, that’s obvious. You can’t look at me without some smart ass comment coming out your mouth, and I can’t hear it without wanting to knock your head off. But we’ve got to learn to deal with one another if we want to make it through this tour.”
“You, knock my head off?” AJ laughed so hard he had to brace his hands on the floor for a moment. When he could breathe again he shifted and sat up on the bed, leaning back on his arms. “That, dear Brian, is fucking hilarious. You couldn’t get a single fucking hit in if you wanted. You know what I think about this whole thing?” Slowly AJ moved to the foot of the bed. He put his feet on the ground and stood up so that he was almost face to face with Brian. “I think you’re an annoying little God-boy who spends half his fucking time preaching at people and judging them off his fucking religious views but he can’t take the time to pull the stick out his ass and actually be a person.”
AJ poked Brian in the chest, backing him up a step, taking Brian’s own temper up a level. He tried to control it as AJ continued on.
“I think you’re just a backwoods little boy who’s been thrown into the big world and has no idea of what he’s getting into. But you’ll follow Cousin Kevin and let him shelter you. All of this shit’s been handed to you like you’re the prodigal fucking son. Not once have you had to work for this shit! Meanwhile the rest of us actually had to work and audition and try here and there and bust our asses to get a chance to do something like this.” AJ continued poking at him. Taking a deep breath, Brian tried his best to control his temper, but with every word and every poke it was growing bigger and bigger. “You think our fighting will ruin the tour? I’ll kick your ass from here to home and back again before I let you fuck this up for me, you self-righteous little bastard”
That was the last straw. Something inside of Brian snapped. “Quit poking at me!” he demanded, placing both hands against AJ’s chest and shoving him back a few steps. Something lit AJ’s eyes and without warning he launched himself at Brian.
Despite what AJ had thought, Brian knew how to fight. He knew how to wrestle, too. So when he and AJ hit the ground he didn’t waste time. He rolled them over before AJ could get his first punch fully in. They ran into the beds as they grappled with one another. Brian almost roared when AJ’s fist connected with his jaw, making it feel like all his teeth had been knocked out. A minute later he landed a solid punch to AJ’s gut.
They fought to gain control, each trying to pin the other one now. With a burst of strength that surprised Brian, AJ suddenly had hold of his hands and was pinning him, full body, to the floor. Looking up into his face, Brian felt only fury. The sight of AJ’s bleeding mouth and the cut on his temple actually made Brian feel proud.
“You little fucker.” AJ swore heatedly at him.
Brian bucked, dislodging him for a moment, and managed to knee AJ in the ribs one more time. Swearing, AJ twisted and slammed their bodies back into the ground; Brian’s head bounced off the carpet, making him see stars. When he opened his eyes, AJ’s face was only inches from his. What happened next stunned the shit out of him. AJ groaned loudly, angrily, and dropped down and kissed him.
Passion exploded in Brian. For a split second he forgot his anger, forgot his hate, and felt only passion. But reason returned and he shoved at AJ’s chest, using the moment of distraction to roll them again. They slammed into the side of the bed, but Brian managed to use his weight to pin AJ down. This time he was the one pinning AJ’s wrists to the ground. He fully intended to say something to him, to ask what the hell that had been about, but his body moved of its own will and he found himself bending his head down and furiously kissing AJ.
Passion and anger were melding together inside of him to make something dark, something that he had never felt before. He felt AJ’s body strain to push up against him and could only moan into their kiss. AJ broke his hands free from Brian’s grip but he didn’t fight to push him away. Instead he grabbed fistfuls of Brian’s hair and deepened their kiss, thrusting his tongue into Brian’s mouth.
Brian bit AJ’s lip, hard, before sucking it into his mouth. He tasted the blood from where AJ had already been bleeding, felt him wince, and it thrilled that dark place inside of him.
“So that’s how it is.” AJ growled when he pulled free. He used his hands in Brian’s hair as well as his hips to roll them again so that Brian was pinned to the floor. Then he moved his mouth, latching on to Brian’s neck and biting the skin there. Brian gasped at the pain and the pleasure this induced. He didn’t know what was going on; never in his life had he felt this way about anyone. Never. But AJ was lighting fires inside of him. His hands were on AJ’s back, the short nails that he had digging into the skin and dragging upwards. He felt AJ moan and hiss against his skin and was thrilled by it.
A knock interrupted the two of them. Freezing, they stared at one another, eyes wide as reality sank back in. Nick’s voice came through the door. “Rok, you there? You were supposed to be at my room like a half hour ago. Everything all right?”
Reality slipped back in; mortification took the place of passion. Had he really been lying here, kissing another man? Kissing AJ? Not just kissing him, but clawing at his back, taking what he wanted, meeting passion for passion.
“If you don’t answer him, he’ll probably bust the door down.” AJ’s face was just inches from his. There was something in those chocolate eyes that had Brian shivering for just a split second. Oh God. What did he say? His eyes locked on the blood that AJ sucked off his bottom lip. Blood that came from a being hit in the mouth and then bit over top of it. He, Brian, had done that! Horror filled him. He wasn’t this kind of person!
“Rok? Hey, Brian, come on. Is everything ok?”
AJ quirked one eyebrow as if to say ‘Well?’ One corner of his mouth was quirked in a smirk.
“Get off me, please.” Brian whispered in a voice that was on the edge of breaking. He didn’t know what to do with himself. Didn’t know how to be right at that moment. These kinds of sensations were new to him. He had never felt anything like it, nor done anything like it either. He’d never even been with a man, period, or even been attracted to one. On top of that, the women that he had been with, he had always been slow and sweet and gentle with them. There hadn’t been this kind of consuming, raging passion.
It almost looked like AJ was going to ignore his request. But then he was slowly pulling away, rising unsteadily to his feet. Brian sat up and looked to AJ. He flushed when he saw the state of arousal that AJ was in.
“Brian? If you don’t answer I’m coming in there!”
AJ rolled his eyes and brought his hand up to wipe at his chin. “You better answer your friend before he succeeds in annoying the shit out of me.”
As he climbed to his feet, Brian shot AJ a mock glare. From the tone of AJ’s voice it seemed like they were back to the sarcasm and animosity of earlier. “He’s just concerned.” He told AJ bitingly. To Nick he called “Just a minute, Frack!”
“Oh, does the little ‘Frick’ need someone to look out for him?” With his usual swagger, AJ strode to the open bathroom door and grabbed a washcloth. He wet it down and pressed it to his lip to stem the blood flow. He wet down another one and, when Brian started to speak, flung it at him so that it hit him in the face. “I’d wipe off your face before you go out there, though.”
Now that passion and anger were fading, aches were settling in. Brian moved the washcloth off his face and moved to look in the mirror by the hotel door. Son of a…that was going to be hell to cover up! There was a cut on his right cheek that was slowly bleeding. Blood had already left a trail down his cheek and his neck and against his ear. He took the washcloth and wiped it up. What was going to be killer was the bruise already forming on the left side of his jaw. AJ had one hell of a right hook!
Once the cut was clean, Brian packed the washcloth against his jaw and stepped up to the door. Nick was banging on it again and Brian could hear AJ swearing and moving to come out of the bathroom. That left him with only the option of opening it and shutting Nick up.
“Man, Nick, I said just a minute. Impatient, are we?” he demanded as he flung the door open.
Nick’s eyes instantly widened as they locked on Brian’s face. ”Holy shit! What on earth happened to your face?” He reached forward and gently took hold of Brian’s chin, turning his head this way and that to look at the bruise and the cut both. As he moved him it reminded Brian that he had aches in other places than just his face. The back of his head hurt from hitting the ground and his gut was aching from the fists and knees that had connected. He hadn’t bothered looking to see if he was bruised anywhere else yet.
What on earth was he going to give for an answer, though? Though he didn’t question why, he didn’t want to implicate AJ in this. If he told Nick that AJ had done this it would be all over the group in no time flat. That was the last thing he wanted. “I, well…”
“We got jumped outside the hotel. Stupid fucking overly crazy fans.” AJ grumbled from back in the room. He walked up and deliberately let Nick see his own beat up face, as well as the bruise that was spreading on his ribs. “I was too busy trying to ignore my daily dose of religion over here and they got the one up on me.”
Even as AJ’s remark irritated him because of the insult, Brian felt a wave of appreciation that AJ was quick enough on his feet to think of a story.
“Jesus, that’s insane.” Nick hissed out.
“It’s nothing, Nick. I’m fine. Just let me grab a clean shirt and I’ll be right out.” Moving quickly, Brian went over to his suitcase and grabbed the first t-shirt his hands came across. He wanted, more than anything, to get out of the room for a while. To get away from AJ, even for a short time. He didn’t know how to deal with what was inside of him. These feelings were different and new and terrifying. Hate and lust bound together, feeding off of one another.
The door shut behind him and Nick was talking as they moved down the hallway, but Brian didn’t hear anything. His mind was replaying what had happened in the room only moments ago. What had happened to him? How had he gone from standing there, hating this man with all of his being, wanting nothing more than to hurt him, to moaning underneath him and clawing down his back? The physical violence was appalling too. Sure, he’d been in fights before, and he’d wrestled millions of times with his brother, with Nick or Kevin. But he had deliberately hurt AJ and enjoyed it. Worse, he’d hurt him even as the passion had exploded, and the sight of that physical pain had fueled his passion. What kind of monster was he?
“Bri? You coming in?” Nick interrupted his thoughts. Looking up, Brian saw that they were standing at Nick’s door. Nick was already inside, curiously watching Brian as he waited for hi mto come in. He shook his head to clear the thoughts away and gave Nick his best smile. “Yeah, Frack. Sorry. Just woolgathering, you know. Let’s do this!”
He forced his mind to focus on the here and now, but it was difficult. A part of him kept going back to that hotel room, wondering what AJ was doing, and what would happen when he went back to go to bed later.