By the time that Mattie rose the next morning, AJ had everything planned out. He had called his mother, and dropped the bombshell about Mattie, with the expected results. First she’d been shocked, then she’d lectured him on safe sex and being a idiot, and then she’d give him her full support. She agreed to catch a plane out for a day and watch Mattie for them to do their final show, but after that she had things that needed to be done and would have to go home.
It had been beyond easy to introduce Mattie to her grandmother. She had instantly fallen in love with ‘Nana’, and together the two had disguised themselves and gone out for a night of shopping and dinner while the boys did their show.
Instead of spending a day or so at the hotel after the show like was normal for them, AJ was planning on flying out the next morning with Mattie and Brian to go home and start getting her settled in.
When he got to the hotel room after the show, Mattie was already in bed, and Denise was packing his things together for him. He couldn’t help but smile and think that some things would never change. “Ma, you don’t have to do that.” he said as he kicked his shoes off against the wall. The look she gave him had him immediately picking the shoes up and putting them by the door. Some things never would change.
“I know I don’t have to. But if I don’t, you’ll just throw it all in without a care for wrinkling everything.” She continued to sit there and fold his clothes one right after another, placing them inside of the suitcase she had lying open on the floor.
AJ sat himself down in the chair instead of throwing himself in it like he usually did. A boy was smart to mind his manners around his Ma, no matter what his age was. “So, how’d the evening go? She give you any trouble?”
“Now, that little girl is an angel, Alexander. Nothing like you were at that age, at least not in personality. She’s a spitting image of you, though.”
“No sh-kidding, huh.” He hastily corrected himself. The look she gave him said that she wasn’t impressed. As always he gave her one of his grins, and her expression softened. They had a very close relationship. Sometimes he felt that his mother was his closest friend. “I feel like an idiot, Ma. How could I have done something so irresponsible?”
She was a long time in answering. Her hands continued to fold and put away clothes, but her look was distant as she thought about her response. Finally she put the last piece of clothing down and looked up at him. “You’re not an idiot, baby. You didn’t make the best choices, that’s true. No mother likes to find out her son has been sleeping with women as a one night stand, but I did know that it was a distinct possibility, especially when you were using.”
He winced, looking down at his hands. No son liked to have to tell his mother those kinds of things, either. She just continued on. “But I think what’s more telling on your character is your reaction to all of this. You didn’t balk from it, didn’t run away and hide. You simply stepped up to the plate and took responsibility for your actions. Not only that, but it’s obvious to see that you love her already. That makes me proud of you, baby.”
No matter how old he got, hearing his Ma say that to him always made him swell up with happiness. Her opinion meant a lot to him. “It makes me feel better to hear you say that.” He admitted to her. “No matter what I know you’ll always tell me if I’ve been stupid.”
“Well, of course. Part of my job.”
He laughed at her, and got a smile in return. Abruptly he was serious. “I’m going to do this right, Ma. I won’t screw this up.”
“I never doubted that.” Her calm assurance was soothing to him. When she rose to her feet, he automatically did the same. Manners were bred in to him, and he never forgot them when he was around her. Denise walked over to her son and wrapped him in her arms for a big hug. “No matter what, baby, I’m proud of you. You have a beautiful daughter in there, and you’re going to be the best daddy. She already loves and adores you.”
“Thank you.” He whispered into her hair. “It won’t hurt that she’ll have the best Nana too.” When she pulled back, he kissed her cheek, enjoying the blush there.
“Get on with you.” She murmured, brushing her hand at him as she went to grab her coat and her purse. “Don’t worry so hard, Alexander. You’ll be fine. I’ll come see you two as soon as I can, ok?”
With another hug and kiss, she was out the door. Pleasantly tired, he stripped down to his shorts and climbed into bed with his daughter.
~~~~~~~~~~
Mattie clung tightly to AJ’s hand when they exited the plane in California. Her eyes traveled everywhere, watching the people around her with a sense of awe and fear. Against his leg, AJ could feel her trembling. With a smile, he passed his carry-on to Brian, and scooped her up in his arms. “We’re almost home, Mattie my love.” He reassured her. She just clung tighter and buried her face in Elephant. Since he’d bought that monkey for her, she hadn’t let go of it.
They made their way through the airport, trying to keep their heads down. No announcement had been made about Mattie yet, and AJ wasn’t sure what he was going to do there. The minute she was known to the public, she would become fodder for the media. They’d be chasing them everywhere, trying to take photos of her, to get the story on who her mother was, where she came from, what her life had been like. He didn’t want to put her through that. Eventually he would have no choice, but for the moment his instinct was to shelter his little angel.
A car was waiting for them, set up earlier in the morning by Brian. He’d been a big help in getting things together for them to go straight to AJ’s house. So had the others in the band. They’d helped Brian and AJ get everything together, and promised that they’d all be out in a week to come and visit. He’d offered to ready rooms for them, but they’d insisted on staying at a hotel nearby.
Thinking of rooms, AJ wondered if everything was ready at home. After that night spent talking with Brian, the two had gone online and ordered the furniture for her room, as well as toys, and a company to go and set it up for him. It was a company that AJ trusted and had used before, so he had no worries about them having access to his home when he wasn’t there.
AJ put Mattie in the booster seat in the rental, snapping her belt in to place. Her eyes were wide, and Elephant was clutched so tightly in her little arms that her knuckles were turning white. “Hey now, what’s this?” he asked when he slid into the passenger’s seat. He reclined the seat and twisted around a little so that he could put his hand over hers. “Are you getting scared there, little love?”
She nodded and buried her face further into Elephant’s head. AJ took her hand in his, letting her squeeze. “Now, I know there’s lots of people here, and it’s a whole new place. But I’m going to be with you.” He had no idea how to reassure her. As Brian pulled the car away from the curb, AJ tried to focus all his attention on his daughter. “We’ve got a pretty room all set up for you, with lots of new things, and a bed just for you.”
“Don’t wanna bed.” She mumbled.
“You don’t want a bed?”
“Don’t wanna bed. Want Papa’s bed.”
The light clicked on for AJ, and he gave her a smile. “You can still sleep with me sometimes.” He whispered, leaning toward her to give her a wink. “I promise. But, you might like your new bed. It’s really pretty. Uncle Brian helped Papa pick it out. It’s a bed fit for my little princess.”
She didn’t answer him, but her grip loosened a little, and her shoulders started to relax. “Toys?” she asked, peeking at him.
This time AJ chuckled. “Of course there’s toys. What’s a room without toys, I ask you. I got you lots of clothes and books and toys to play with. You’ll have lots of fun in there, I promise.”
“Dolls?”
“Yep, dolls too.”
This seemed to set her at ease, and her smile bloomed full force at him. AJ wished his life was as easy as a child’s, to have his fears so easily put down. He turned his attention to Brian, enjoying watching him drive down the road. There was a small smile curving those beautiful lips, and he was humming to himself. All in all, a cute image. “You think they got it all set up by now?” AJ asked him.
“I’m sure they do, you paid them enough to be ready.” Brian teased, flashing him a wink. It never failed to amaze AJ how this man could devastate with just a single look.
“Well, they better, or there’s going to be trouble.”
“Oh, so scary, Alex.” Came the teasing reply.
To drown his friend out, AJ turned the radio on, and soon they were singing along to the music playing, much to Mattie’s enjoyment. She loved it when they sang for her.
It didn’t take them long to reach AJ’s house. Time seemed to fly by, and suddenly they were unloading the car, and Mattie was clinging to him, nervous all over again. He picked her up, and went to the front door, entering the code and unlocking the locks to lead them all inside. As usual, he dropped his own bags at the door, intending to take care of them later. This time, he had something he wanted to do right away.
“Let’s go see this room of yours, princess.” He said, trying to get her excited. Putting her on her feet, he took her hand and pretended to run, calling as he went “Let’s go! I can’t wait to see it; I bet it’s so pretty!” By the time they reached her door, she was laughing and running alongside of him, just as eager.
AJ flung the door open, and sighed in relief. They had set everything up. Then he marveled at the transformation. What had once been a half assed office was now a perfect little girl’s room. The walls had been painted pale pinks and purples, with matching curtains. Her white four poster bed sat against one wall, with the airy guaze that Brian had insisted she would love. There were side rails on it, to guarantee that she wouldn’t roll out of it at night.
Against another wall was her dresser, and beside it a little vanity for her to play at. There was a new bookshelf full of children’s books, and a toy box overflowing with toys. Another one of Brian’s ideas, a little doll house and a bunch of dolls sat near another wall. Over the hardwood floor he had ordered a soft pale purple carpet for her to lie on and play on.
Mattie seemed overwhelmed by everything. She squeezed AJ’s hand and stared around the room. Squatting down by her, AJ smiled. “What do you think, Mattie luv? Do you like it? It’s all for you.”
“Mine?” she whispered.
AJ nodded, letting go of her hand and propelling her lightly inside. “All yours. Go ahead, go check it out. Look at the dolls over there that Uncle Brian got for you.” He led her to the doll house, sitting on the floor to show her all the little dolls.
From the doorway, Brian watched as father and daughter explored everything inside of the room. He felt his heart swell with love for the both of them. Mattie was an adorable child, who had already found a way into his heart. He agreed with AJ; he couldn’t imagine his life without her in it now. The strength of his feelings shocked him, but at the same time he understood. He felt so much for AJ; all of it had opened and flowered in him that night that they had kissed. Mattie was a part of AJ, and therefor he loved her. Add on that she was a darling child with a sweet smile and a kindness in her that her mother had never been able to take away, well, his heart was lost to her.
The love in him grew and swelled as he watched AJ stretch out on the fuzzy purple carpet, not even flinching as Mattie, who was now totally relaxed in this room, handed him a doll and was showing him how to do her hair. She babbled as she did, in that half English, have toddler language that most three year olds had.
In that moment, Brian knew that he would wait, no matter how long it took. Because, in just a short time, these two had become his world. His everything. Right here in this room, he found his family.